These are the true confessions of a reformed white knuckler.
I’ve had to pry my clammy little fingers off of the control I’m trying
to maintain over issues that I just basically can do nothing about in
the present moment. I have to come clean and take responsibility for
it. Though I have been on the spiritual path for many, many years I find
it much easier to stay peaceful, trusting, and balanced when things are
going smoothly.

In recent times things have gotten challenging
and I lost faith. I realized in the knick of time that I was allowing my
fear, frustration, and lack of faith to frazzle me. I am very grateful
that my health scare wound up being just a scare. Seems like everything
else dulls in comparison when our health is in question. I was jolted
back into the present moment and became really aware of what I was
creating. We sure are powerful creators!!

We really do need to
surrender to this process. We are undergoing some difficult times and it
is forcing us to take stock of what is really important and put things
in their proper perspective. We are taking a major inventory of our
lives. It is an excellent opportunity to review our priorities and
choose what really matters and what is just plain baggage that is
weighing us down.

I have my mediation for my loan modification
coming up soon. I have gone through this process for over a year now and
I have replayed in my mind all the different scenarios, what I will
say, what they will say and the outcome. I am worn out and exhausted
from thinking about it so much. I have finally taken my white knuckles
off of the situation, handed it over to the Universe and am focusing on
other things until the day and time arrives for me to resolve it once
and for all. Thinking about it is only taking up precious space in my
brain and filling it with worry. I’ve got better things to do with my
time!

Occupying our time with things we enjoy shifts the focus
from our issues. Now that the weather has changed I am thrilled to be
able to take my peaceful evening moonlit strolls with my dogs. It gives
me a chance to clear my mind, enjoy the gentle breeze and savor the
quiet. Such divine pleasures life offers us!!

We have
unconditional, unlimited support from the Universe. I have a strong
connection with the angelic realm, especially Archangel Michael. I
effortlessly receive guidance and intuition when I want or need it,
however when I am overwrought it does not easily come. When we preoccupy
ourselves with negative emotions we block our channels. Ironically the
guidance we are looking for cannot arrive due to our harried state of
being.

Letting go of whatever it is we are desperately trying to
hold onto is the first step in achieving a peaceful, balanced, happy
disposition. All outcomes occur in divine timing, not necessarily our
timing. We are not seeing the big picture! By prying our fingertips off
of the obsessive thoughts, compulsive worrying, and fluctuating emotions
we can return to a more harmonious state of be-ing.

The ascension
process we are undergoing is intense. No doubt about it. Ultimately, we
are the creators of our own destiny. What we want to achieve in the
future is really about what we are creating now! If I wait to be
peaceful when (and I won’t say if) my loan modification comes through I
will be a bent out of shape mess of a woman and I won’t be able to
appreciate what I have anyway! There will always be something lurking
in the corner needing to be resolved. If we are always focused on the
problems we are missing out on the opportunities to enjoy what we have.
There is nothing outside of ourselves that can waiver our serenity. We
are most certainly in control of that (if nothing else!!)

At one
time or another each one of us is faced with a challenge. It is not
imposed upon us to weaken us, but in actuality to strengthen our core
and show us how brave and fearless we actually are. We are warriors of
the light because we bring light to the darkest of situations. We raise
our torch and those who are in darkness follow the light of our way. We
are the way-show-ers because we have the capacity to face whatever
problems come our way and not sacrifice our unwavering spirit.

In
the new earth energy by white knuckling it, we are preventing ourselves
from being in the divine flow from which all things manifest. The energy
is shifting and changing so rapidly that we cannot get so caught up in
outcomes. Circumstances and situations that seem concrete are so fluid
that the only thing we can rely on is keeping our thoughts positive and
knowing with certainty that what is meant for our highest and greatest
good will prevail.

So, I reformed my ways. I have truly let go and
breathe through any fears or worries that may arise. I know, with
certainty in my heart, that all is as it is meant to be. I have
relinquished control and follow the flow of energy.

Prayer

Dear God,

I
release the control I thought I had over the current issues I am
facing. I hand over to you both the problem and the solution. I ask that
you pave the way for me. I choose peace over worry; happiness over
sorrow; faith over fear. I do not allow things outside of myself to
waiver my serenity. I am a sovereign being that is alignment with my
divine plan. I place my trust in You. I place my thoughts and emotions
on my many blessings. Thank you for your unconditional support and
guidance.

And so it is.

Amen.